New Start Again?

January 02, 2024, a day I had eagerly anticipated for months. The thrill of receiving the first written interview invitation from York Region filled me with an indescribable joy. It was a moment that sent me twirling in a dance of elation, and there, in front of T&T, Dudu and I celebrated this small victory. Cloud nine didn't seem high enough to encapsulate the emotions that surged through me.

Four months of waiting, wondering, and worrying finally led to this moment. I had almost resigned myself to the idea that perhaps an interview with York Region was not in the cards for me. But here it was, a glimmer of hope that reignited my dreams of returning to the Greater Toronto Area (GTA). The prospect of leaving behind the solitude I experienced in Niagara was a beacon of light.

Living in Niagara had its own set of challenges. Loneliness, I realized, could be one of the most disheartening things in the world. The move to Niagara had prompted me to reflect on the notion that life shouldn't be solely about work. Deep down, I've always known this truth, but circumstances seemed to have cornered me into a position where work took precedence.

The struggles with the previous school, the rejections from kindergartens, and the subsequent dent in my confidence added layers of complexity to my journey. People around me insisted that working in the school board would guarantee stability and a promising future. Yet, as I immersed myself in the role of a supply teacher in Niagara, I discovered that the reality was far from enjoyable or fulfilling.

Sure, the daily salary was relatively better than the private school market, but the sense of accomplishment and joy in teaching were conspicuously absent. The schools lacked resources, especially considering the influx of immigrants. Portable classrooms, small and dim, failed to create an optimal learning environment. The shortage of laptops, books, and exercises highlighted the stark challenges faced by both educators and students. Witnessing this disparity left me wondering how students could truly learn, particularly the art of writing.

As I prepare for the upcoming interview with York Region District School Board (YRDSB) and Peel District School Board (PDSB) for a secondary occasional teaching position, I find myself grappling with mixed emotions. The prospect of a stable and prospective life looms ahead, yet I question whether it aligns with my ideals of meaningful and fulfilling work.

Dear Lord, guide me through these interviews, grant me the courage to navigate the path ahead, and help me make choices that resonate with my values and aspirations.

Our First Christmas and New Year's Eve

Sinan and I celebrated our first Christmas and New Year's Eve together in Toronto! I had the pleasure of meeting Nancy Yu, Ursula, Cynthia, Kenny, Carol, and an aunt from RHCCC Church. I was overjoyed to reunite with Aunt Sandy and Uncle Wing after a gap of 5 months! They even inquired about our Turkey trip — it's been too long. I miss them dearly; they are adorable seniors.

However, this holiday season, I noticed my love shedding tears lately. Before this, I believed our relationship was flourishing. We were getting to know each other better, cherishing our time together, and overcoming challenges. But, to be honest, I'm uncertain about our path forward. I fear that my presence might be adding pressure. I never expected nationality to be a factor in a relationship.

Dear Lord, grant us the courage to navigate these uncertainties. I truly desire a lifetime with Dudu. I want to cook for him, nurture him with love and care, be his companion, travel together, and shower him with love everyday. At times, I can't bear the thought of him being alone. I want his life to be vibrant with love and color.

離開香港第557日

踏入香港國際機場足足是一年半前的事，

記得當天我下午去時半放學，爸爸的車就在學校門口等候著⋯⋯ 

帶完放學隊，有家長門依依不捨的抱了我，有眼淚，有叮嚀，有很多心底說不出的說話⋯⋯ 

還記得當天恩恩、蕊其、淑萍，我們四在小息吃送別餅，是我當時最喜歡的小甜點，嘻嘻⋯⋯ 

最想不到就是最後在機場，整班好同事、朋友都前來送機，我知道當天是有校務會議，其實他們真的下班趕過來⋯⋯ 

實在太辛苦了 多謝你們在我低谷的時候陪伴了我⋯⋯ 

多謝你們⋯⋯ 

來到加拿大🇨🇦後，有更多意想不到的事發生了。 

竟然第一份工作可繼續教育工作，感謝主對我的恩典。

但最大的恩典就是賜結我一個心地善良的男朋友。 

他的品格高尚，在教會裏對老人家總是有耐性，對我總是溫柔並且充滿愛。 

男朋友是我在加拿大最大的收穫。 

他的出現是神對我的愛。 他的陪伴是提醒我神的旨意。 

他信奉東正教。

在香港，相比起新教基督徒教，這是一個較少人會信奉的。 

聖經的話語本來是很難明白，我一直覺得要全心歸天父才可以完全「明白」及「感受」神的話語。

New Chapter

Months after Turkey family trip mark a significant turning point in my life, I feel so excited about my new chapter in Canada. After saying goodbye to Renaissance Academy, I embraced a fresh working opportunity with the District School Board of Niagara (DSBN)...

The decision to move to Niagara for a supply teaching position was both exhilarating and nerve-wracking, but little did I know how instrumental the support of my caring love dudu would be in making this transition smoother. 

I remember the day he drove a considerable distance just to accompany me on a room visit in Niagara Falls and subsequently helped me relocate from Vaughan to Niagara. His willingness to navigate the highways, knowing I couldn't, was a gesture that I'll forever be grateful for. Without his help, the journey wouldn't have been as smooth and stress-free. Leaving behind Renaissance Academy also meant saying goodbye to my wonderful landlord, Lynn. She was more than just someone who provided a place to live; she became a friend, a confidante, and a source of comfort. Lynn and I used to share meals, exchange stories, and simply enjoy each other's company after a day of work. Her easygoing nature made the co-living experience incredibly pleasant, and it's hard to put into words how much I'll miss her. Lynn, you've made me feel at home, and I sincerely hope our paths cross again xoxo

As I settle into my supply teaching role with DSBN since November 8th, I'm filled with a mix of anticipation and hope for the future. The prospect of keeping this job and seeing where it leads is both exciting and a bit daunting. Change is never easy, but with the support of Dudu and the fond memories of my time with Lynn, I'm ready to embrace whatever comes my way.

Our 7-Month Mensiversary

Time seems to be slipping through my fingers, and today marks the 7-month milestone of Sinan and me being together since that fateful day in March. I still remember every detail of that afternoon vividly – the nervousness, the excitement, and the warmth that Sinan brought into my life. As the clock struck the end of my workday, I found myself hesitating to call an Uber. You see, back then, I had only been driving for two months, and the thought of navigating downtown traffic filled me with anxiety. Catherine, my dear friend, gave me the much-needed encouragement to go downtown to see Sinan and his friends. It meant a lot to me that Sinan remembered I wanted to meet his friends and that he took the initiative to invite me. 

Love, I've come to realize, is all about those little things.The night was daunting with its thick blanket of snow and freezing temperatures, but my heart remained warm. Sinan's hand rested on my shoulder as we all prepared to walk to the restaurant. I was shy and unsure of how to react. And when he saw me getting out of the Uber, he rushed over and lifted me off the ground. My heart raced, and I was torn – should I wrap my arms around him? Would he think I was too forward if I did? So, I hesitated. Inside the restaurant, our hands found each other naturally. I could feel the warmth emanating from his soul. Sinan gazed at me when he thought I wasn't looking, and again, I was caught in a dilemma. Should I make direct eye contact or pretend not to notice? My nerves always seemed to get the best of me. 

Later, in the vehicle with his friend Uugh driving me back home, we shared a kiss in the backseat. It had been a while, and I hoped he didn't notice my hesitation. The kisses were sweet and effortless, a testament to the connection we shared. As his friend dropped me off, I couldn't help but wonder when I'd see him again. All I wanted was for them to get home safely, and I silently thanked myself for taking the leap to meet Sinan. What an incredible and memorable night it was. 

Love is indeed in the little things, in the moments that make your heart race and your spirit soar. Here's to many more months and adventures with Sinan.

Adventures in Turkey: Istanbul, Cappadocia, and Antalya

I'm back with tales from our unforgettable journey through Turkey—our whirlwind adventure through Istanbul, Cappadocia, and Antalya. It all started as a sudden suggestion from me, a moment of clarity amidst the chaos of my school situation. The toxic environment had taken its toll, with late payments, bounced checks, poor management, and an irresponsible owner and principal. 😓 It was time for a change. So, one night, I called up Sinan and proposed that we embark on this adventure together. The joy that surged through me when he agreed was immeasurable. 😄 Our trip was a beautiful blend of love, care, and adventure. 

I had the pleasure of meeting Sinan's friends and family, and staying at his home. Spending time with his family was a highlight. His mom, in particular, was a gracious mum, showing me how to create delectable dishes like lentil soup, curry chicken, and that irresistible chili sauce. Sinan's constant eating and nighttime us-time were a delight. 🍲🍴🌶️ Each day came with a packed itinerary, and there were moments when I struggled to wake up in the morning due to exhaustion. 😴 But amidst all that, one morning stands out as unforgettable. 🌄 It was the day we witnessed hot air balloons painting the sky with their vibrant colors. We hopped into a cab, chasing those balloons, and captured stunning photos from a higher vantage point. It was pure magic. Sinan's dedication to waking up at 4 am just to be with me and fulfill his promise of showing me the hot air balloons left me feeling incredibly loved. It was amazing! 🎈❤️ knowing how Sinan helped his friend in our trip further illuminated his kindness and good-hearted nature. Our journey was more than just sightseeing; it was about the bonds we formed along the way. Friendships made the places we visited even more special. 

👫 One evening, we had an incredible dinner with Murret and his sister. The food was beyond delicious, and I may have embarrassed myself by eating more than my fair share. It's funny how good food has that effect! 🍽️😅 

 After our adventures in Cappadocia, we made our way to Antalya to visit Grandma. She's been a rock in Sinan's life since childhood, and I felt truly grateful for her care. Grandma, if you're reading this someday, please stay healthy. We promise to bring our grandchildren to visit you in the future. 🏡👵 This trip was more than I could have ever imagined—a journey filled with love, new friendships, delicious food, and breathtaking moments. It's a chapter of my life that I'll forever hold dear. 

No restroom breaks for two days 🥲

(Credit to ChatGPT as I couldn't write at 5 a.m.) 

 Dear _____ and Principal _____, 

I am writing to bring to your attention a pressing issue regarding our current camp staffing situation. As of now, there are no camp counselors available, and all camp teachers, including the photographer Eason, are on sick leave. This situation has resulted in a serious shortage of staff members to effectively manage the camp activities. 

As a concerned member of the school community, I believe it is crucial for us to reflect on whether the demands of the camp are overwhelming for our existing staff. It might be prudent to consider expanding the pool of available teachers who can contribute to the camp. I kindly request that the school administration considers this staffing dilemma seriously and contemplates the necessity of revising our approach to organizing such camps in the future. It could be beneficial to initiate a management review to assess the overall impact and feasibility of our current camp structure. 

Presently, we are faced with a situation where, due to the lack of manpower, we are compelled to combine two classes into one tomorrow. With ONLY two teachers and a single camp counselor available, managing three classes becomes impossible. Teachers are unable to take necessary breaks, including restroom breaks. This not only impacts their health and well-being but also impairs their ability to provide the best care and guidance to our students. Thank you for your time and consideration.